NEWSFLASH!!! NEW VIRUS SAID TO SELECTIVELY TARGET COMPUTERS OF CONSCIOUS KmtywS!!!!-gctid48049

[Ɔbenfo Ọbádélé]

NEWSFLASH!!! NEW VIRUS SAID TO SELECTIVELY TARGET COMPUTERS OF "CONSCIOUS KmtywS"!!!!
by Ɔkyeame Kwame
Accra, Ghana
23, December, 2011

NEWSFLASH!

Breaking news: In a freak turn of events, it has just been reported that one of the most devastating cross-platform computer viruses has stormed the internet within the past 24 hours.

The virus is said to selectively target the devices of "conscious Kmtyws", effectively restricting their access to white-owned sites and automatically redirecting them to Kmtyw-owned sites.


Ọba Ɔhene Babaláwo Ɔkɔmfo Kofi McGillacutty I, a shocked "Conscious Kmtyw" forced to actually spend time on Kmtyw-owned websites

Known hacker group Anonymous has publicly denied responsibility for this new insidious virus instead pointing to a new collective simply known as In-cog-negro; a group known variously as a crack team of hackers or a hack team of crackers.

A message posted on the website of In-cog-negro group, a self-described drop squad of internet activity said that it hacked into CIA and government databases collected from each time "conscious Kmtyws" logged into white-owned sites and specifically targeted those who talked about "Black liberation", "Kmtyw liberation", "Black empowerment" and the like.

One self-described "conscious Kmtyw" spoke on the condition of anonymity saying "I never knew that talking about Black liberation would have such devastating effects on me and my family. This is the most terrible thing that has ever happened to me. I tried through my PC, my Mac, my ipad! Virtually every shiny white gadget I could purchase from a non-Kmtyw! And I just kept getting redirected to these #$@%* Black-owned sites! If I can't talk about Kmtyw liberation on white owned sites, then what is the point of living???"

Indeed in a rash new development, some conscious Kmtyws, upon unsuccessfully trying to remove the virus by going to computer specialists such as the Nerd Squad and the Geek Team have simply thrown their laptops in the trash.

Other "conscious Kmtyws" have actually committed suicide. One suicide note from a prominent Kmtyw-centered author read, "Discussing Kmtyw liberation and Kmtyw-centeredness exclusively on white-owned sites has come to define who I am as an Kmtyw-centered person. If I cannot do so any longer, then I refuse to take yet another Kmtyw-centered breath."


"I know I typed in the correct website address, what the #₵% is this?!?" - Queen Nefertortilla Jones

This In-cog-negro drop squad virus is said to be affecting PCs, Macs, Linux and Unix systems as well as smartphones including Blackberry, iPhone and Android phones effectively making them intelligent-phones.

We were able to get a comment from an Kmtyw website owner, Obadele Kambon, whose site, AbibitumiKasa.com has seen a huge uptick in traffic. He had this to say: "It's really amazing! With all of the conscious Kmtyws who were exclusively posting on white-owned sites now being redirected to Kmtyw-owned sites we have not only been able to employ Kmtyw coders, designers and developers, now we have enough resources to actually fund the Kmtyw world revolution single-handedly!"

However that may not be necessary, apparently the "conscious Kmtyws" are ready to start their own revolution, taking their anger and frustration to the streets, picking up guns and pepper spray, starting "Inhabit wall street" movements and petitioning white-owned and government controlled websites to save them from having to spend any time whatsoever on Kmtyw-owned sites.

Their pleas to those white-owned sites may not amount to much and may indeed fall on deaf ears. We're just getting word that AbibitumiKasa.com, using the vast influx of resources from the redirected "conscious Kmtyws", has just implemented a hostile takeover of prominent sites including Google.com, Yahoo.com, facebook.com, microsoft.com, ebay.com and amazon.com!

AbibitumiKasa.com spokesman Obadele Kambon had this to say: "Well, now that 'conscious Kmtyws' have had their energies redirected in the virtual world, we can only hope that the In-cog-negro drop squad can come up with something to redirect their energies in the real world. For that would be a true revolution indeed!"

Apparently Gil Scott Heron was right: the revolution was not televised, it was downloaded and then streamed live.

Reporting live from Accra, Ghana, this has been Ɔkyeame Kwame. We'll keep you updated as more news of this and other top stories becomes available!

   ©2011 Abibitumi (Black Power) Newsgroup

[asarhondo]

It's really amazing! With all of the conscious Kmtyws who were exclusively posting on white-owned sites now being redirected to Kmtyw-owned sites we have not only been able to employ Kmtyw coders, designers and developers, now we have enough resources to actually fund the Kmtyw world revolution single-handedly!"

So true. Incidentally, I find it interesting to say the least that you posted this satirical article a day after I deactivated my Facebook account. I have decided that using Facebook is counter productive for me. My online time needs to be limited but when I do use the internet I wish to support Kmtyw businesses. Now that I think about it. I'll make a $50  donation right now.

[Agbede]

:haha: :haha: :haha:
 
This sounds like the backdrop for a "Spook Who Sat By the Door" sequel!

[Ɔbenfo Ọbádélé]

NEWSFLASH!!! NEW VIRUS SAID TO SELECTIVELY TARGET COMPUTERS OF "CONSCIOUS KmtywS"!!!!
by Ɔkyeame Kwame
Accra, Ghana
23, December, 2011

 UPDATE!

In an apparent attempt to thwart the efforts of "conscious Kmtyws" who have resorted to purchasing new laptops to avoid spending time on Kmtyw-owned sites, new Internet Juggernaut AbibitumiKasa.com has taken preemptive measures to cut them off at the pass by implementing hostile takeovers of the following sites:

'"

n".self::process_list_items("'.str_replace('
', '', '

• linkedin
  
• linkedout
  
• linkedaround
  
• linkedby
  
• netlog
  
• logbook
  
• cookbook
  
• myspace
  
• yourspace
  
• outerspace
  
• gimmesomespace
  
• tagged
  
• ragged
  
• sagged
  
• ning
  
• bing
  
• ding
  
• ping
  
• sing
  
• bling
  
• chickenwing
  ').'")."n[/list type=decimal]"'
  
  "Not again! Come on! I'm not leaving here until I can say something about Kmtyw liberation on a white-owned site! #₵@%! " - Khadijah Imani Jackson
  
  And the list is growing. Apparently soon there will be no place left online for "conscious Kmtyws" to hide and they'll be forced to actually spend time on Kmtyw-owned sites one way or the other. Big brother is here folks, and it's actually a Big Brother...
  
  Reporting live from Accra, Ghana, this has been Ɔkyeame Kwame. We'll  keep you updated as more news of this and other top stories becomes  available!
  --
   
     ©2011 Abibitumi (Black Power) Newsgroup